Sophie is a week old, oh my goodness the time flies!
She’s in fluff (cloth diapers) now, they are still a bit big, but they don’t leak or anything. The diapers that fit PERFECT were a gift from an online baby shower swap, but I need to get to the diaper store to get some covers ASAP before she outgrows them.
The booties were a gift from my midwife, she brought her two pair, they are equally adorable!
Don’t let the look of decorum fool you, she is so excited she could just poop.
I knew I wanted this birth to be different. I wanted to fulfill my longtime dream of a home birth, but financially a hospital birth was more reasonable. However, after being dissatisfied with my first two midwives, and then having little issues come up with my third midwife, who then told me she was not delivering after April, I decided it was time to listen to my heart and follow my desires. A chance conversation on MDC (Mothering Dot Commune) with a local woman inspired me to start searching again for homebirth midwives for the third time, this time I spoke to Jan Eklund, whom I could tell had a great passion for midwifery and was willing to work with us financially.
Once I was at ease with my decision I informed my family, who were very uncomfortable with my decision, however they were able to put their own feelings aside to support me. My mom even decided to fly in during my 40th week of pregnancy in hopes of being here for the birth.
My due date, May 30th, came and went without more than Braxton Hicks. The 31st my mom flew in from Washington. On the 1st, my husband, kids and I packed a large picnic and ate it at a local park. That night at 7 pm I started having contractions 8 minutes apart lasting 3 minutes long and needing to be concentrated through. They continued all through the night slowing around 2 am and stopping at 4 am.
I was frustrated and Bobby and I were both exhausted from lack of sleep, so he took the day off from work to stay home with me (June 2nd). Austin and Christopher were acting wild and we were all tired, so I sent them outside to play on their scooter and bike so they would burn off some energy while Bobby and I tried to recover ours. Shortly after leaving, Christopher came in crying, he had fallen off his scooter and we decided it probably needed x-rayed so my mom and I took him to urgent care to get it looked at, sure enough it was broken and he needed to see the orthopedic specialist the next day to see if it needed a cast.
Tuesday morning, I woke up at 7 am no longer able to ignore the contractions that had been waking me in the night. Before he left for work, Bobby told me I had been groaning all night and he would reach over and feel my stomach and it would be hard. I called my midwife Jan and my doula Candace to let them know I may be in pre-labor. The contractions were stronger than the ones on Sunday, but irregular. I took a nap after lunch and they really started to intensify, to the point where I sent my mom and son off to the Ortho with my insurance card and a note because I did not think I would do well at the appointment.
Around 8 pm, on the 3rd, Jan called me to ask how I was doing because she was getting ready for bed and wanted to know if she should expect a call in the night or not, and after talking we decided she would come over just to check on me since I had canceled our appointment earlier that day. When she checked my progress, she said I was 4-5 cm dilated and 95% effaced and wanted to camp out because she felt this was the real deal.
I went ahead and called Candace and she called Kim, who was going to be my second doula, and they arrived around 10 pm. Once everyone got here, my contractions responded and started getting much stronger; however, they were in my back and required a lot of rubbing and counter pressure. Candace and Kim helped me find different positions to labor in and helped me with stair walking activities to make sure my baby was in a good position.
They also rubbed my back with the contractions and my feet and shoulders between them. Around midnight, the pressure was getting more intense so I asked if I could get in the tub, so Jan checked me again and told me I had not made a lot of progress, but she could probably stretch me to 7cm and I was ok to try laboring in the tub.
Once she stretched me, the contractions started coming a lot faster so the water of the birthing tub was heavenly. My contractions slowed and I was able to rest between them, but when they came on they were extremely intense and in my back. I was trying very hard to remain calm, but inside I was starting to feel panicky. Halfway into each of the rushes, I started grunting and pushing a little, but I still was not feeling the urge to push, I just wanted to vocalize and express the sensations I was feeling.
I remember hearing one of my doulas ask Jan if I was complete, she was in the tub with me, and I heard her say “don’t worry; she will push when she is ready”. Hearing these words gave me hope that I may be near the end. The back labor was like nothing I have ever felt before, I did not have the urge to push, yet my body was pushing the baby down and my support team was telling me to push through the sensations and it would feel better. I was feeling frustrated that I was doing all this work and nothing was happening, and the power I was feeling was very intense. I was roaring like a lion with each surge and clinging to my mom and husband for support. Soon I felt the most amazing thing ever as I could feel her coming down into the birth canal, it felt like I had a bowling ball inside of me and I was feeling so powerful, I pushed again and I heard the midwife exclaim the head was out. The rest of her just seemed to slide out and my baby was here! At 1:43 am on Wednesday, June 4th, 2008 my baby girl Sophia Elanna came into this world with open eyes and a very calm demeanor. She also was born with a nuchal hand (hand born next to her head) and I had a tiny “skid mark” which is a tiny abrasion, but not a single tear. I did not need any sort of repair.
The flood of emotions I was feeling was so intense, from trying to process the physical sensations I had felt, to having my baby there in my arms, to just feeling disbelief that I did it. I felt so powerful and even was able to climb out of the tub and onto my bed with little assistance while still holding my baby who had a very short cord. Not long after getting in bed, I delivered the placenta. This was amazing to me since I did not remember that part of my other deliveries, as they wasted no time in my hospital births and pulled it out almost immediately.
Everyone worked on cleaning up while I got a chance to bond and cuddle with my baby girl. She was so calm and wide eyed, and alert. She just took everything in, lifting her head to look around. Jan then did the newborn exam, her APGAR was 9, and she was 6 lbs 10 oz and 18 7/8th inches long.
When the cord stopped pulsating, and was ready to cut, my midwife asked Bobby if he wanted to do it and he declined, so I was about to cut it, but asked my mom to do it, since she was such a key element to my positive birth experience and I felt if anyone deserved the honor, it was her.
Around 3:30 am I took my shower, it was so wonderful, and by a little after 4 am, I was able to go to bed, however I do not think I slept at all until around 7 am when Bobby took her downstairs for a little while to get some cuddle time. Sophie is such a sweet, calm little baby; she is a cuddle bug and nursing like a champion. She does not really have a fussy time, but she does have times where she is active.
This birth, by far, was my most rewarding. Even though I had epidurals to take care of the physical pain in Christopher and Matthew’s hospital births, that could not take away the mental pain of regrets and dissatisfaction with all the interventions. Being in my own home, in my own comfort zone, with an amazing birth & support team, and the amazing techniques I learned from my Hypnobabies home study courses made the entire experience breathtakingly beautiful. I felt so calm, Zen-like during my birthing time, and I was able to handle each contraction as it came, and let it go when it left, and not think about the next one until it was upon me. My head space stayed clean and I never once felt like I could not handle it anymore and needed drugs. I cannot get over the feeling of accomplishment and pride I feel. I did it!
Special thanks to my doulas Candace (above) and Kim (below) who reminded me of my strength through the entire labor and birth, and who’s tireless hands comforted me through each contraction helping me keep my calm. And of course to my calm and collect midwife, Jan, who brought so much wisdom and experience to my birth, and for making it possible for me to fulfill my dream of a homebirth.
And I just had to include this picture, because it shows how tired my poor family is the morning of the birth.
And of course, thank you to my beautiful mother, who flew in to support me during my birth, even though she was uncomfortable with homebirth. She never once wavered in her unconditional love and support. She never once showed fear, even though she told me later she was scared when Sophie was taking a while to clear the mucous from her throat and we let her work it out without suction.
Just a girly picture of Sophie at 5 days old. Birth story to come later, once little miss lets me have a few minutes to put it together.
Wow, at the end of her 3rd day, a few hours before her fourth day, Sophie’s cord stump is gone! My midwife had me using Goldenseal powder on it a few times a day and it was amazing!
In celebration, Sophie and I took a bath this morning. This little girl, born into the water, LOVES her baths. I supported her head and just let her float and she was in peace, she did not even mind when I rinsed the shampoo off her hair.
Austin and Christopher are adjusting just fine to the new family member, however Matthew is having a harder time with losing his place as the baby. He is more defiant and crabby, so I am trying to make sure I am giving him more attention than usual. This has been a bit of a challenge because Sophie only sleeps while being held, but we are trying to change this, my little boy needs me.
This is what people look like with a 3-day-old baby in the house. So yeah, in the 4 pics my mom took, someone looked crappy in each of them, so I used the one where I looked the most decent, because I gave birth 60 hours earlier and had not showered or gotten dressed yet (that day, I have showered many times since the birth). Later I was back in my pre-pregnancy jeans and clean, so go me.
I would type more, but I am one handed right now. So I will just add I am working on my birth story, and all is well with us, this has been a super easy transition & recovery.
*A few details*
18-24 hours of early labor, 6 hours of active labor, and 15 minutes of pushing. She was born at home in the water and is just as sweet as can be. The boys and I just adore her and she already has us wrapped around her little finger.
I hesitate to put this in writing as babies know how to read and then say - “Psych! I was just joking.”
I have been contracting every 4-8 minutes lasting over a minute for the last 2 hours. I was contracting every 5-15 minutes this morning starting at 7am and these are a LOT harder to focus through. Birth team is on standby and I am going to have Bobby take a walk with me when he gets home from work.
I had to send my mom to the ortho with Christopher to get his arm fixed, by herself, in a strange town, in a minivan (she has never driven a minivan) and the staff there were so nice when I called to explain why I could not make it.
Anyways, send me all the “for petes sake, let this FINALLY be the real thing” easy labor vibes and let’s hope I have a good update soon… mama wants this baby girl out NOW!
Between 3 days of appointments on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday thanks to the school Chris is on the waiting list for, weekly midwife visits, and then my mom flying in on Saturday I have been plenty busy. I almost feel like nature is trying to keep me going to keep my mind off being overdue.
Well, I guess they were all slacking because I apparently was not busy enough. Austin and Christopher were bored today, so I told them to go outside and play. Austin took his bike, Chris took his scooter. About 20 minutes later, Christopher comes in crying and holding his left arm. He fell off his scooter and caught himself with his wrist. I sent him to run cold water on it and took a shower, thinking he was just sore. Bobby comes in (more on why he was home in a little bit) and tells me it is pretty swollen so he thinks he should be seen. Ok, so I tell him to call urgent care and make an appointment and my mom and I will take him in.
So we get him to urgent care and he in bouncing off the walls, acting totally fine, putting pressure on his arms, making it look like a wasted trip. We actually tell him to settle down because we are worried they will send us home with ice and Motrin and not x-ray his arm. The PA comes in, she is super sweet, takes his history, notes the small amount of swelling and then sends us downstairs to radiology. Chris seems smitten by the cute x-ray tech, she is a pretty little thing though. A short while later, my mom hears someone say “buckle break, room 5″ in the hallway and my mom asks “are we room 5?” Crap. Sure enough, it was us. Christopher broke his arm. The PA tells us the buckle fracture is one of the most common childhood fractures and that he will need to see an orthopedic doctor, however he may or may not need a cast. He has a splint and a sling right now and it seems to be doing fine. Here is a picture of what a buckle break looks like (this is not Christopher’s x-ray, just one I found on the web).
I am keeping plenty busy, between urgent care today, and ortho tomorrow afternoon. I also see my midwife tomorrow for my 40w4d visit, and HOPEFULLY our last prenatal. Last night I was thinking I was going to be seeing her sooner as I had around 9 hours of strong contractions every 8 minutes lasting 3 minutes in length. Around 4am my body surrendered to exhaustion and that was the end of those. Since then I have been having irregular contractions. Sometimes minutes apart, sometimes hours, mostly in my back. I put the doula and midwife on alert, so I am sure I will get a long restful night of sleep tonight. *sigh* I did get a good nap in this evening hoping to keep well rested in case it started again at dinner time, but nothing significant. My mom leaves in 5 days, please cross your fingers we can get something going before she leaves!
