Mistakes in Motherhood

Sophie saw her cardiologist today because a murmur was detected at an appointment I had for her funny walk. Thankfully, both her walk, and her heart is normal. The cardiologist called it an innocent murmur I think.

While I was there, he asked how tall my husband and I were, and I told him we were both short, me at 5’4″ and him 5’6″ and he smiled real big and said “well there is why she is so tiny, two chihuahuas can’t make a great dane you know”.

So there you have it, she is a normal pigeon toed, innocent heart murmured chihuahua, and yes, that diagnosis is official. I hope when I see the gastroenterologist next week, he will agree with the diagnosis.

No Comments | In: People, Places & Things | tags: Health, Silliness, Sophia. | #

I never did update about what happened at the dealership and parts store. I bailed his car out of car jail on Tuesday morning with only a $46 bill, vs. the $90 I was told. I actually just left it there and they removed the dud battery for me, loaded it into my van and I went to the parts store. I showed him the bill and what they said and he took the dud battery, put a new one out in my car for me and apologized for the inconvenience. I decided not to press the issue with getting them to pay for the bill, more than anything I just wanted an apology. The dealership put in the new battery and washed his car up all pretty for me without charging me extra. My service coordinator was so pleasant that I decided to order some parts, and bring the car back for some other things it needs done before we move.

Because I have to arrange for them to shuttle me back and forth to the dealership, I decided tonight I would take it in, this time to fix a couple cosmetic things and repair his remote start & alarm. After the recent battery incident, it sure made me appreciate my dealership. I have always hated finding and trusting new mechanics, because you hear so many horror stories of shady mechanics. The disadvantage of moving so often, is you get to start over at a new city, and have to find all new services. This is why I love the Google Age so much, word of mouth has always been the way I find businesses, but if that is not available, I am all about the review sites. I have never been a fan of flipping through the phone book.

I found this new website today, called RepairPal that is pretty interesting. You can put in information about your car, repair needed, and zipcode and they will not only give you a range to expect the estimate to be, but shops nearby with peer reviews, which would look like this page showing some San Fransisco auto repair shops. Out of curiosity I put in his Civic and pretended it really had needed an alternator and it came up with a very comprehensive report. Not only did it tell me the range of costs I would be expecting for parts & labor, but then it also gives me recommendations of things I make sure are done (i.e. which other tests I make sure they do) and explanations of symptoms and other necessary repairs that may be necessary. Not just that, then maps out shops in my areas with reviews.

The other helpful part of the website is you can enter a specific make, model and year of a vehicle and get reviews, common problems, recalls, etc. So if you wanted to learn more about a 2001 Honda Accord, it would be easy to look up ratings, reviews, recalls, and common mechanical problems. Other neat features are a car encyclopedia, in case you wanted to look up what a timing belt replacement entails; and a section called My Car where you can keep track of your maintenance and repair records, plus get reminders, recall information and service reminders, and best of all it is all FREE!

When we move next month, it is nice knowing I will be able to find a place to take our cars that I can trust, I am extremely loyal to my service center and look forward to finding a place that can take care of all of our car needs, from oil changes, to mechanical repairs.

1 Comment | In: People, Places & Things | tags: Auto Stuff, Bobby, Me, Sponsored. | #

But Matthew found my keys! They were in the toy bins, in the bin that hold the hotwheels. I guess Sophie was trying to drive the cars huh? And I guess Austin was not forthcoming when I asked him several times if he checked in the toys.

1 Comment | In: People, Places & Things | tags: Austin, Auto Stuff, Matthew. | #

As the mom to a toddler, I feel like my life of cuddling a sweet little baby has been snatched away from me evolved. I now feel my primary duty is no longer as a nurturer, but now as a protector. Just today I was telling a friend how I felt like I spend my entire day saving my daughter from certain death. Just before I typed that I pulled a screw cap out of her mouth, and an alan wrench and nail clippers out of her hands. We are now on day two without any keys to my car, and I have a feeling my 13 year old had a 27 inch toe-headed accomplice. She’s like a ferret without organization, she will steal from you, but lacks follow through to stash them away in a specific hidey hole.

She’s getting better at entertaining herself, she will walk upstairs by herself and play with Matthew in his room for 10-30 minutes at a time before moving on to her next game, heist, or inadvertent demise. This is bittersweet, as part of me is happy she is able to play independently, while at the same time I worry she won’t make it to her second birthday. Now that she conquered her fears about walking, she seems to have no more healthy fears left and is quite the little daredevil.

Her imagination is really starting to blossom too. Not long ago I wondered why we owned so many toys that no one played with, and now I am amazed at how, and how much she plays with them. She imitates so much and it is funny watching her play and realizing that she is imitating normal daily household activities. For instance she will put her purse on her shoulder and then push the shopping cart by her toy box picking out play foods, which she will then transfer into the refrigerator of her toy kitchen. She will also rock her babies and pat their backs, shush them, and coo at them. The toy kitchen has provided countless hours of play for Sophie and Matthew alike, as well as help from Austin and Christopher too from time to time.

I guess the more I look at this time, the more good I see in her growth and maturity. She is really amazing to watch as she grows into a young child. However, I do with, that for once, I could actually eat all of my own food. I feel like I get to only take a bite or two of whatever I have before I have to hand it over to one of the younger two. Yet if I put it in front of them, they won’t eat it, or will cry for what I have, even if it is the exact same thing.

No Comments | In: People, Places & Things | tags: Amazement, Family, Parenting, Sophia, Toddlers. | #

I am not the type to make formal resolutions, but I have really let myself go in the last year. Not in the typical “boy she let herself go”, sort of way. In fact I have gotten quite a bit healthier in the last 6 month (she says as she crams caramel corn into her face). More I have let myself go creatively… and I have really let my blog suffer. Seems that once again I have let real life get in the way, and I probably spent a bit too much time on Facebook too.

So the last month has been a whirlwind of emotion. You know the feeling of standing on a rug, then at the last minute having it yanked right out from underneath you? Well, that was my December. For the last 11 months, we have been looking for houses in North Virginia… just to find out that we may be going elsewhere. No big deal, except for… we have no clue where we are going. We won’t know for another week… but we have to be there in a month. Yes, a MONTH. Simply put, I am a freaking, freak-out, McFreakerson, mess.

We have also had a ton of health surprises with our little princess. She “failed” her 18 month well-baby checkup so to speak. She got the label of failure to thrive because she is growing too slow. This has earned her a couple referrals to specialists, a long list of lab tests, xrays, and a visit for her strange way of walking yielded a referral to a cardiologist for a heart murmur. On the bright side, December brought me a baby who can FINALLY walk. I had decided when she turned 16 months old that she would crawl off to college; and the tender age of 18 months and one week, she joined the upright world. She took off running, never looking back.

2010 will bring good things to anyone who looks for it. The second month of 2010 will bring home Bobby from Iraq, and new adventures in a new city and state. Thankfully, January should fly by since I will have just 3 weeks to find a place to live, interview and hire moving companies, research schools and neighborhoods in a new location, and all the other little bits and pieces. I am looking forward to the last month of his deployment not dragging, like the 9th month of pregnancy always does. I am really hoping I can keep busy enough that it will seem like no time before he’s home.

No Comments | In: People, Places & Things, This is how I roll | tags: Family, Health, Ramblings, Sophia, Updates. | #

Matthew is quite the little smart mouth. Tonight he was being a pain and being naughty, so I sent him to bed 30 minutes early. He stormed up to his room, very angry at me; I could hear his toys being flung and him storming around up there. I planned on letting him blow off some steam, and then go up there to talk to him and then hug and kiss him goodnight and talk to him about his behavior.

While he was cooling down, Austin went upstairs to get some pajamas for Sophie out of Matthew’s room, and I hear them arguing and then I hear Matthew say “IF YOU TELL HER, I WILL KICK YOU!!!” Austin came running downstairs with a silly smile on his face and explained that he needed to tell me what Matthew said. I guess in a fit of rage, my darling sweet son turned into some sort of monster when he told Austin angrily “Next time I see Mommy with a knife, I am going to tell her I hope she cuts her head off!”

The problem with this statement, is that it would be nearly impossible for me to keep a straight face when confronting him about it. After having a giggle and updating my Facebook page, I called my parents to take turns telling them one of my near-famous “Matthew Stories”. They also had a giggle and then I mustered as much composure as I could and “angrily” marched upstairs.

Matthew was very remorseful and said he let some angry words come out and that he was very sad about what he said. He claimed he tried to say “next time I see mommy with a knife, I am going to tell her I hope she cuts some vegetables“, but the other words just slipped out. This is where I had to turn my head and hold my breath to keep from cracking up. He apologized freely and we talked about how it was not okay to be naughty like he had been when I sent him to bed early, and that he needs to try not to have angry words, because once the words are out they cannot go back and can hurt someone’s feelings. I gave him a hug and a kiss goodnight, and surprisingly enough he went to bed fairly easily. I have a feeling he was tired in the first place, causing the naughty behavior in the first place that led to angry words. Having a four year old is an adventure.

No Comments | In: People, Places & Things | tags: Family, Humor, Matthew, Parenting, Silliness, Sons. | #

My darling daughter has a dark side. She is absolutely addicted to grapes. There is no other food on this earth that makes me as happy as grapes, and no other food that makes her scream more. She signs “more grapes” all day long. She will let out the loudest, shrillest squawk every time she sees grapes. We can be in the grocery store, at home, in a restaurant, it does not matter. She absolutely flipped her top over fake grapes the other day, even after the discovered they were rubber, she *still* cried for them.

Today I made her a sandwich, and gave her some grapes on the side (I have to restrict them to one time a day now), and she gobbled down the grapes and then screamed for more, completely ignoring her sandwich, her milk, her cheese and even a blueberry muffin. We cannot even say the word without her getting upset if they don’t appear on her tray. We have been reduced to spelling the word when she is in earshot.

The other day I was making a grocery list, after my 4 year old hijacked the list and wrote “candy” on it (with spelling help from his brother), and then asked him “Austin, how do you spell fried chicken?”, I asked Sophie if there was anything she wished to add to the list and she signed “more grapes”. Months earlier I had taken her to Costco and she starts wigging out saying the word more repeatedly and signing more. I finally saw on the other side of the room was a box of grapes.

I do hope this phase comes to an end soon, or she potty trains soon. Grapes are not digested fully and are not fun at diaper changes. I am sure you can get your own mental image without me painting a picture, so I will leave it at that. Luckily, grapes have been on sale, and all the kids enjoy them, but man I wish she would mix it up a bit and find a few different foods to love.

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I am so sore today, I have found all the muscles in my body, especially in my butt. This morning while crawling into my van I actually checked to see if I was sitting on something…. nope, it was just my swollen glutes. My hands felt bruised when holding the steering wheel. I felt beat up. How did I sustain these injuries? Well, for one, it was a direct result of not listening. It was a secondary response to me not realizing when I was out of my league.

Let’s start at the beginning. Yesterday I was bored. It was 2pm and I was up the night before until 4am so I was feeling tired and stir crazy and I decided a nice fall walk in the unseasonably warm weather would be just what I need. I posed an invitation to my local friends on Facebook to suggest a great place to visit with the baby on my back, the three kids on foot, and our two large dogs. It was suggested that I take the kids & dogs to Helen Hunt Falls. I stopped by the grocery store on the way and got energy bars and we had water bottles, a backpack and were ready to go. My GPS could not find Helen Hunt falls, so I set it to Seven Falls, a pay-to-visit area nearby the free Helen Hunt Falls. I now know this was my first mistake.

It was a beautiful drive once I got to the Broadmoor area of town. The temperature was near perfect, the air was clean and crisp. The trees were a lush array of yellows and reds and there was a small dusting of leaves below them. The red rocks towered above us, as the road narrowed to a small guard-post where we paid our $20 entrance fee. This is what lead to the second mistake.

We head a couple miles up a very narrow road to the parking area and chaotically unload kids and pets and jackets and packs. I put the baby in a pack on my back and take the Great Dane. Christopher gets the backpack as the Golden Retriever is too much for him to handle. The dogs excitedly yank us up the hill to the falls pulling us to each new person, smell, chipmunk, or dog.

The visitor center had a small walk-through next to a stream on the left of it. The water was crystal clear and small fish swam around. If you have ever been to Disney and been on splash mountain, you will remember how happy the ride was until moments before you took the death defying plunge to the bottom. I felt much this way as the stairs emerged before us. Remember where I said paying $20 was my second mistake? That is because I figured if we paid for it, we might as well enjoy it, right? So the sign at the bottom of the falls warn you that the climb is 224 steps. Two HUNDRED and twenty four.

It was probably around step 50 and the dogs freaked out with the height that I realized what a huge mistake I had made. I was cursing the friend who recommended this death trap and feeling overwhelmed by a 95 pound dog who’s attitude about the steps is to just run up as fast as she could to get it over with, dragging me and the baby along with her.

At the first platform we took a small break to drink a little water and mentally prep for the second climb. There was another woman with a tiny toy poodle and a baby. My dogs were trying to mess with the puppy and felt like they were pulling our arms out of our sockets in order to sniff the puppy. When the stairs cleared I decided we had better press on while we could.

It was about halfway up the second set of stairs that I felt like my lungs were about to explode. Matthew was scared and clinging to the rails, Isis was trying to drag me up to be with Austin and Chloe, and I feel like I am going to die. There were people waiting at the top to climb down so I pressed on, red faced, out of shape, and winded.

At the top of the stairs, there was another 2 hour round trip to Helen Hunt’s burial site, but at 4pm I started freaking out that we had started way too late, that I was exhausted, and most importantly that we had to get the dogs back down those steps, potentially in the dark! Austin and I were deciding how we were going to get the dogs down the stairs and I think we had just decided that when we got back to the stairs, that Austin and Chris would go down with one dog, and Chris would wait at the bottom with the one dog, while Austin would climb back up to get the other dog and head down again. At about this time a gentleman approached us and said that they would be closing the path soon and that he would be happy to take one of the dogs down half way for us so I could use two hands to hold onto the rail with the baby on my back. On the middle landing, a young gentleman offered to take the dog the rest of the way down so our first volunteer could wait for his wife to come down the stairs.

About this time I was feeling pretty bummed that we could not finish our hike, so we decided to take the mountain elevator to the other side of the canyon to see views of the falls.

The falls were gorgeous, although I do wish they had been more swollen with water. I bet in the spring when the snow is melting they are an amazing sight.

I will really miss the red rocks of Colorado. By this time I was already looking forward to taking another hike through Garden of the Gods one last time before we leave Colorado.

Sophie was pretty bored with the whole trip, she didn’t quite understand why I would not let her climb up the stairs that were no more than plastic steps supported by a single beam in the center of the steps and handrails.

The little boys had a good time, even if they did not get to finish the hike.

We took the scenic drive on the way home and decided I would take the boys out to dinner for the fist time in months after I showered. While in the shower I realized that my friend had NOT recommended Seven Falls, where we had gone. But a lesser waterfall down the road in a free area without any stairs! Next time I will run in and mapquest driving directions to any place that my GPS cannot find, and I won’t push the kids and dogs and I up an area that is too much for us. I don’t regret the trip at all, I just wish we had left the dogs at home and gone earlier to be able to take the two hour hike.

1 Comment | In: People, Places & Things, This is how I roll | tags: Family, Fur Babies/Pets, Insanity, Me, Photography, Vacations. | #

Dear Max,
This is what happens when you have big brothers! Don’t listen to them, they are evil. Remember this, they do not have any money for ice cream, if they did they would already have spent it. Even if they cross their heart and hope to die they can’t get you a pony, where could they get one? Don’t fall for that one, and know that they have no permission to allow you to stay up past your bedtime, only Mom and maybe Dad have that ability. Do not listen to them it will not be really, really, really fun, no matter what they tell you. A promise to come back in just a few minutes is not an enforceable contract! Neither is a promise to pick up the dog poo on your day. Danger always lurks behind a double dog dare. Anything involving shovels, BB guns or jumping off anything with a parachute made of a sheet should raise a red flag in your mind. Remember these rules because if you forget them later on they’ll be saying “I’ll hold your beer, go for it.” Watch out for girls, too. The girl that came by later and made the boobs in the sand in front of you did not have your best interest in mind. I will try to have more advice for you as I see that you may need it. Love Grandpa

Matthew in the sand

No Comments | In: People, Places & Things | tags: Family, Humor, Matthew. | #

*Now, with working pictures!!*

Wow, what a whirlwind of the last 3 months. I had a GLORIOUS summer. First vacation was up to Glenwood Hot Springs a few hours northeast of here in Glenwood Colorado.

The drive was gorgeous, the kids loved all the tunnels and the hot springs were amazing. The pool was a city block and so comfortable. Sophie fell asleep floating in my arms several times.

The next weekend we went to Canon City about an hour from here to camp in these amazing little one bedroom (sleeps 6) cabin with a full kitchen and bathroom. We stayed at a Yogi Bear campground, so the kids were super busy with activities and contests. Austin did an essay for a contest on his dad since we were there for father’s day and made me cry.

As soon as we were unpacked from Yogi I packed up the 4 kids and two large dogs and drove 1200 miles to visit my family. I got to spend a few days in Montana with my oldest sister and her 5 little ones (sorta, two teens, a tween, the youngest two are the most adorable twin toddler girls!!) After that I went to my parents land in Idaho where we spent the 4th of July on the beach, picked huckleberries, and enjoyed each others company. My grandparents came over from Montana to see us and it was so wonderful to see them again. Then we headed back to Spokane were we went back and forth between Spokane and the cabin in Idaho for the rest of the month. I also got to see my other sister and her two kids who are just amazing kids. My niece writes music and plays them on the guitar and athletic and confident and just a remarkable young woman. Here are a few pictures of our time in Priest Lake:

Two days after we returned from Idaho, Bobby came home from Iraq for 3 weeks. Our anniversary is July 28th and he flew home the afternoon of the 27th so with the help of my friend Tracie I was able to plan an amazing little getaway. We went to a super nice restaurant in town and then I surprised him with an overnight stay in a gorgeous suite at a 4 star hotel at the Cliff House in Manitou Springs. They had a bottle of wine and chocolate covered strawberries and a rose waiting for us when we arrived.

Then we were off for our family vacation to Disney World!! The kids had NO idea where we were going so when we missed our flight they were super bummed. A night at the Hilton near the airport and all was forgotten.

When we finally made it to Orlando we had so much fun. The weather was hot and muggy but we did not mind. The park was crowded and the lines were long but we barely noticed. By the end of the day we were so happy we had rented a house and had our own rooms to go to and a full kitchen so we could just grab a bowl of cereal and crash for the night. We spent two days at the Magic Kingdom.

Then we spent a day in Epcot, which really was not enough!

We also spent a day at Animal Kingdom, where my camera battery promptly died and a rushed day at Hollywood Studios because we were having a little get together with three families who live in Florida whom I have been friends with for seven years. Talk about a fun night!! The kids got along great, the men folk hit it off instantly, and we girls had a blast talking the night away.

Bobby’s vacation was over before we knew it and the boys headed back to school. Austin and Christopher are both in middle school this year and Matthew is in his last year of preschool.

They are enjoying school, except Austin had a problem with his math teacher. She was bullying him and talking down to him since day one. She seemed to single him out. Anyone who knows Austin knows this kid is a golden child. Today he *asked* me if he could put my laundry away for me and folded a basket of laundry without being asked and then put it away. The same child I heard tell his brothers “lets keep the kitchen clean, mom worked hard on it today”. Well his breaking point was when he was sitting on his feet so he could see his math book, he’s short like we are and the desks are bigger this year. The teacher yelled at him to sit on his butt and when he explained he could not see if he sat that way she told him “maybe you need to have your mommy send you in with a booster seat?!” Austin did not say anything, but went to the principal to demand a new teacher because he was tired of being treated like dirt and then having her demand his respect. The school still has not called to tell me of this incident or to apologize, but I have not called them either as I kind of fell like this is Austin’s battle, not mine and he is handling it like a true warrior!

Christopher has his ups and downs. On one hand he is helping out more to earn money to replace games he lost of Austin’s, he mowed the lawn for me tonight. On the other hand he is having problems with doing what he needs to do in a timely matter (getting ready for school, completing homework, etc) and he has had a few outbursts here and there that are uncalled for.

Matthew is having a hard time with preschool this year, he’s having some major separation issues and clings to me at drop-off. Once I leave he is fine, but man he wrenches at my heart strings. Today I was listening to music and he said to me “I sure like this song about them living in a lallow sub-barine!!” He’s a funny boy.

Other than that, we are trying to adjust to Sophie’s moods. She’s getting 4 molars in right now and her 4 front teeth are still trying to come in the rest of the way. If that is not bad enough, because of teething she is getting horrible bleeding diaper rashes so both ends are hurting her. She is talking up a storm and says “here you go” “go bye?” “yogurt” “mommy” “Austin” among all her other words. She’s a smart little thing and made her toy say bye-bye by cycling through other sounds until it came back to bye-bye again when I was pressuring her to wave bye-bye to me.

Bobby and I are doing well, 5 more months until he gets home and I am just trying to stay busy to help move time. I am also trying to get healthier and keep my house cleaner. I am trying to get into the habit of going to the gym on M, W & F when I drop the kids off at school. I have already started to see and feel changes in myself.

So, if you have made it this far, here is my massive update of why I have been MIA. I am hoping be around a little more now that school has started. If you want a link to *all* my Disney pics the link is here.

1 Comment | In: People, Places & Things | tags: Austin, Bobby, Christopher, Family, Finances, Matthew, Me, Photography, Silliness, Sophia, Vacations. | #