Mistakes in Motherhood

With the oldest 3 kids in school I have been struggling a bit trying to keep the princess from being bored without her entertainment. She did not care for my ideas; coloring turned her into a sobbing puddle of goo, reading to her just annoyed her, and car rides to do stuff just ended in us both being frustrated. About the only thing she enjoyed doing was taking out every toy she owned, and digging through her dresser and discarding clean clothes onto the floor mixed with dirty clothes. Flustered, I had had enough. I reached out to my friends on Facebook who recommended toy rotation. And so the planning process started. I made a difficult decision to finally allow the 6 year old and 3 year old share a room, they had been asking for a year, but when I let them sleep in the room with the bunk beds, sleepovers were always cut short because of climbing accidents.

So instead of moving the kids into the room with the bunk beds, I left the loft portion of the bed in the playroom and removed the latter, and put the bottom bed into Sophie’s room. We got two large bags of clothes out of dressers to go to Goodwill, and packed up NINE totes of toys, each tote holding 11 gallons, which will be stored in our storage room until we rotate them in, and move other toys out. It was hard to let go of a lot of the clothes. In the process I also donated the last of my scrub sets. It was a hard decision, I always thought about going back to nursing school, or working as a nurse aide again, but it just does not make sense to store them any longer, especially when I can easily get more at places like http://www.blueskyscrubs.com/ so easily.

I am tickled at how well the two rooms look, and it will be very easy to move Liam’s crib into the play room once he is ready to leave our room. Bedtime has not been as seamless, 6 days later we are still struggling with them falling asleep in a timely matter. We are still dealing with fighting and tattling, but either in time I will grow immune, or they will chill it out. Another perk, I now have a “guest room”, so as long as you don’t mind literally climbing into bed, or sleeping in a room filled with toys.

Next on the agenda, is going to be going through my kitchen to get rid of dishes, and appliances I no longer need. Taking a trip to the dump, and getting my storage room back in control.

No Comments | In: This is how I roll | tags: Domestic Diva, House Stuff, Insanity, Liam, Matthew, Parenting, Sophia, Sponsored. | #

My girl can eat, I know this. At age 3, she’s a whopping 26 lbs, and size 18 month pants (2T shirts) so it is easy to assume she eats like a bird, but she can easily match what her 6 year old brother eats. This last week though, she has been in rare form, easily eating seconds or thirds at every meal. Today was no exception, the “I’m huuuuuuuu-ngry” started the moment she rolled out of bed at 6:30am. By 7am she had already had a bowl of cereal, a bagel, and a handful of dried fruit and nuts. At 8am to “I want a snack” chorus started. Every time I turned around “I’m hungry” and “I want a snack!”

Evey time she opened her mouth to whine, I slowly felt my sanity slipping away that I was clawing at to keep a small grasp on. But I pushed on, I knew I had to be productive. First I tried to find my wool shaver, Liam’s wool diaper was looking kind of pilly. I searched high and low and could not find it, so I moved on and started soaking some covers in the sink. While searching for the shaver, I gathered some other items I needed for knitting later today when I get a chance. I turned around and Sophie was holding a handful of stitch markers she had taken off with a week before. We had searched high and low, but they never turned up. All we had to do was look on top of my comforter, under the throw at the foot of my bed. Well duh, what an obvious place!

I knew all hell would break loose if I set foot in my kitchen, so by 10am I still had not had breakfast or a second cup of coffee. Even when I removed the cup of water she set on my laptop, I moved it to the kitchen table just so I would not have to hear her flip out if I walked by the fridge. However, now I was at an impasse, if I wanted to put away the stitch markers, I would have to go into the kitchen to put them back in the container. Again, not where I had it, and not where I would look, but unfortunately, there it was. True to form, she started her “I’m hungry” chant, so I figured if I was in for a penny I was in for a pound. I made another cup of coffee, and cut a slice of cake, yes, cake for breakfast. In my defense, I added walnuts to it last night and called it coffee cake, and coffee cake is breakfast cake, right?

I finally think my day is looking back up. Sophie is watching TV next to me, letting me write this. I will feed her an early lunch here in a couple minutes, I am hoping she will take a nap, or at least lay down, while Liam is down for his nap. I am hoping he gets a good nap, I had a hard time getting him down, Sophie would not leave my room as I was laying him in his crib. Scratch this, the garbage truck came to pick up my trash, and now he’s crying. I think I need more coffee and cake.

1 Comment | In: A lot about nothing | | #

I think the most frustrating job as a busy mom is keeping my carpets clean. With 5 kids, a big dog, 3 cats, and exposed dirt in the back yard, I feel like I am fighting an uphill battle. It never fails that within a week of sweating behind a carpet cleaner for several hours, someone will spill something, or dig in dirt and track it all over my floor.

Today I had to spot clean dirt tracked in from the dog, the 3 year old, red sauce in the dining room, and a mystery spot in the living room, all this within seven days of cleaning the entire upstairs. I am lucky though that I have a decent carpet cleaner, and a mini cleaner that I can do touch ups with. However, the very best cleaners in the world cannot help me when it comes to the task I have been putting off, cleaning my sofa and chairs.

Cleaning my sofas and chairs is a job that to me is ten thousand times worse than carpet cleaning, especially with my microfiber sofa and dining room chairs. They boast that they are easy to clean, which I agree, they release stains easily… however, I always feel like I am not doing a good enough job because I leave streaks and lines behind. My husband talked me into a light colored reclining sofa when we moved here 18 months ago, and it was probably the worse purchase I have ever made. Not only is it falling apart from all the moving parts, but it is white!? Need I say more? Any kind of water I get one this thing leaves water spots and it looks worse than it did before. I should probably invest in a visit from a professional cleaner, but part of me just wants to go buy a new couch, and leave my husband out of the decision making process.

Image courtesy of http://www.thesteamteam.com/ for upholstery cleaning services austin.

No Comments | In: A lot about nothing | | #

Liam has a bit of a summer cold, with a bit of a wheezy unproductive cough, so I figured a hot shower might do some good and moving some of his phlegm. All went well, until I laid him on my bed, turned to grab a diaper and said to him “do not pee on my bed”. I may as well have just given him a formal invitation to whiz on my bed, because sure enough, he crawled forward, and there was a nice big puddle on my sheets.

I forgot rule #1, you manifest what you ask for, and by telling him not to pee on my bed, the universe hear “pee on bed”, just like my sweet boy. Ever wonder why when you say “I am not going to throw up, I am not going to throw up” your body hears “time to puke?” The word “not” is just too complicated. Try telling your kids “do not wipe your hands on your pants”, do they grab a napkin? No way! The second you say that, their hands go right for their jeans and wipe peanut butter all over their lap. Next time, say “napkin please!” and hand them a napkin. I bet they will spare their pants.

The word “not” goes missing in a lot of things in life (and any negative statement for that reason). Pay your bills, buy groceries and fill your car up with gas, tell yourself “I am so broke” when you have only a couple hundred dollars in the account, and an unexpected expense will come up. Some say “that is so ironic”, it is not irony, it is you communicating what you want. Just like you teach others how to treat you, you teach the universe how to treat you.

I use the word “universe” here, but it may mean many things. The creator, God, fate, your body, destiny, etc., it really just depends on your belief of how things work. Really watch your self-speak for a week or so, and see how you manifest your own destiny. Tell a friend “my brother is coming for a visit, he’s such a pain in the neck”. The day of his visit, you wake up with a stiff neck… wonder why? You told your body to manifest the stress you are feeling over his visit literally.

Back to Liam peeing on my bed. In the end, his action was a positive one, as I was stripping my bed grumbling about them needing washed, I noticed some clean sheets I had folded and laid out at the foot of my bed last week. I had planned on putting clean sheets on my bed, but then never got around to it. This was just another way I was being nudged to do the right thing and be productive.

No Comments | In: A lot about nothing | | #

This weekend, I had a fabulous time in Portland with the kiddos. We went for a fabulous baby shower, and got to take in the sights while I was there. The one downside, is I could not bring my new lover. His name is Keurig, and he brings a fire to my belly and a glow to my soul. If you have never met Keurig, mi amour, here is a picture:

Seriously. BEST mother’s day gift EVER. I tease my husband he got me addicted to coffee to get me to quit harping on him for his cigar addiction. Well dangit, it worked.

While in Portland, I missed my new lover so much. I walked by many Starbucks and City Coffees, which were just teases because it wasn’t even 7pm and they were CLOSED! I could make a cup or two in my room, but the taste was not as good as my Tully’s or Wolfgang Puck flavors. In a sample pack I got some Chef’s Reserve Colombian Decaf and I was thinking “decaf?! Why in the hell would I want THAT?!?” Well, around 10pm I was jonsing for a good cup o joe, I had some convenience store brew on the way home that was just not that lovely, and then got busy with unpacking, kids, and laundry, so when that craving hit I almost cried when I saw how late it was until I spun my little k-cup carousel and saw my petite little k-cup-o-decaf. *swoon*

Not only is it heaven in my mouth, but it shouldn’t prevent me from melting into my bed. Ohhhh how I missed my bed. The hotel beds were fantastic, but how wonderful can they be when the baby is co-sleeping and figured he can have around the clock access to the breast he normally does not demand 3 feet away from me in his crib and a 3 year old kicking me.

However, the apple who tried to fill my craving for a doughnut…. while I do give it an A for effort for trying, gets an F for completion.

4 Comments | In: A lot about nothing | tags: Domestic Diva, Silliness, Vacations. | #

Nothing like purchases on the bank statement that you do not recognize to get your mind spinning and your pulse racing. I had two such charges tonight and they almost made me panic and get my free credit score. I knew they were probably something I could easily explain, especially with me traveling and spending at new places, but it got me thinking of the steps I would take if I really did have suspicious charges on your bank register:

• Look at the date of purchase and try to remember what you were doing that day. What did you eat? Where did you go? Who were you with? Remember, some times there is a delay, so try to think of the 1-3 days before the purchase date, especially on weekends.
• Google the name or better yet, if they provide an address you can almost guarantee google maps will jog your memory. I remember in Colorado Springs “SDI” would throw me off when I saw it on my bank statement. A quick google of SDI helped me remember the half priced drinks I had gotten that week for happy hour at Sonic Drive-In.
• Check your pockets/purse/wallet for receipts. Pending totals may differ from actual totals, especially for gas stations, hotels, or places with gratuity. You may remember spending $24 on a haircut, but the total may be pending as $19 if you left a $5 tip.
• If your bank provides a category, you may be able to narrow down what you were doing if/when you made the purchase.
• If you have a joint account, check with your spouse.
• If you shop online, scan your inbox, sometimes there is a delay in billing and if you ordered something days ago, but it is just now being shipped, there may be a phantom charge you don’t recognize.
• Call your bank, they can see phone numbers an addresses you may not be privy to on your end. They can also transfer you to their fraud unit if they deem the charges suspicious.
• If the fraud unit deems your account breached, they will freeze your account activity, cancel your card, and reissue you a new one.
• Follow up with the three major credit reporting bureaus to make sure nothing unusual shows up on your credit report to lower you credit score.

Thankfully, I was able to hunt down my recent receipts in my purse, and the mystery of the two phantom purchases were solved. 99.9% of the time it is an innocent mistake of forgetfulness, but it is nice to have an emergency plan in place on how to handle mystery charges.

No Comments | In: A lot about nothing | tags: Finances, Sponsored. | #

I ended up throwing in the towel half way into day 8. However, I made it the whole 7 days, and I felt fine conceding. I decided to put little boy back into pockets because he had a stealth-poo and took a long nap, and when he woke up, his little bits were pretty angry. I tossed my flats in and covers in the washer and I feel pretty darn proud of myself. When I was folding laundry tonight I was able to get a better grip on how many flats, wipes and covers I ended up using.

• 5 covers, 4 Thirsties v2, size small, $6.50 from Diaper Swappers, and 1 Fab Fitted, print, $13.25. Total $39.25
• 16 Target Flour Sack Towels, $1 each, 3 birdseye Flats, $1.80 each, 2 preemie prefolds, .80 each. Total $23
• 1 snappi $4, 15 wipes $3 (repurposed, torn blankets, and baby washcloths). Homer camp style Wash Bucket, $7. Total $14

So for $76.25, I was able to cloth diaper my baby, with the right supplies, for life!

The good: Flats were surprisingly easy! Folding was not as complicated or time consuming as I assumed. We had 3 leaks in 8 days, so they are very absorbent. I had no problem changing a diaper at 6am while half asleep with a wiggly baby. Being a geographically single mom with 4 other kids did not complicate it. My flats are SO forgiving, they are still beautiful white, soft, and smell like cotton. One of my covers got a little stained, but nothing that will effect wear. I love how trim they are, and how small they will fold into my suitcase when we travel. Line drying was so simple, and even on an overcast cool slightly breezy day, clothesline flats and covers dried much faster than inside hung diapers. Overnight is the perfect amount of time for indoor drying.

The bad: I will not lie, hand washing was hard. It was time consuming, tiring, and I really missed my washer and dryer at the end. In a real life situation I would probably have a larger quantity of diapers, and covers on hand. I would probably also try to borrow a washer a few times a week. I also would use a better plunger, my wood handled plunger ended up flaking paint onto my diapers. I also was not impressed on how much water it took to get my diapers clean.

The ugly: My hands are pretty calloused, my shoulders hurt the first part of the week, and my nerves were shot at the end by trying to wash quickly while the baby was napping, or folding flats off the line one handed with baby in arms. Liam was less than patient at times, and there were washes where I would get the baby calmed, run, agitate two minutes, comfort a baby again, plunge some more.

What I would do/do different: Like I said, I better handle for a plunger was necessary. My adjustable shower head that can adjust to a single jet was a lifesaver. A wet pail where it could not pose a drowning risk was so helpful. Hangers and clothespins to hang diapers from worked out so well. Line drying even when chilly and overcast pays off. A sense of humor was mandatory, as well as a healthy dose of determination. Splashing was almost guaranteed, wearing pajamas that I was going to change out of with pants rolled up worked well. I may have looked for a faster drying cover, I look forward to an Econobum coming in the mail, I hear they dry well. NEVER underestimate the power of the sun, instant whitener and stain lifter!

The best thing about this challenge was my confidence in myself, the amazing sense of community I gained, and the information gathered that I could not help but tell everyone about! In the forums, I repeatedly told people to try flats and come look at my blog. In Target, I stopped a young couple who were cloth diapering their baby and struggling with the start up cost and gave them a primer on flat use. And to my mom, who was probably ready for me to shut up already on cloth diapers in general.

What I am going to do next: Because I know I have all these new flats that I enjoy using, I am going to start de-stashing. I already got rid of quite a few older diapers. Next going will be newborn diapers split between 2 families, and then all my girly diapers to a friend north of me. After that? Who knows. Maybe I will find a family to sponsor with a primer guide as well as a half dozen flats and a cover?

Thank you Kim, at Dirty Diaper Laundry for taking us with you on what you described as Diaper Boot Camp. I feel like a much stronger warrior now, and I will continue to fight for the cause; for healthy bottoms, healthy budgets, and a healthy planet!

No Comments | In: A lot about nothing | tags: Cloth Diapers, Domestic Diva, Liam, Parenting, Updates. | #

After yesterday’s sunshine, and today’s prediction that it would be even more sunny and hot, I decided I would wet pail (just as it sounds, you are storing dirty diapers in a pail full of water) my diapers until I could wash them this morning. Either the wet pail worked, or my mom-nesia blocked out a lack of BMs yesterday, because he only had a couple spots that needed hand scrubbing.

My one issue with hand washing is the incredible amount of water usage. I am not the most water conservative person, but I felt like I was using up a lot more water than I wanted to be. So I used the water from my shower to wet pail. When I was cleaning my hair, I let the soapy water drain over my diapers. I let them soak in that. And while I was showering this morning I used that time to rinse my diapers. Then while I was shaving, I let the water fill up the bucket with a small scoop of tide and then when I was all clean I agitated them, rinsed them, wrung them out and hung them to dry, hoping that the ominous black clouds decide not to dump until after my diapers are dry and off the line.

Today is officially the last day, but I am thinking I am going to extend until tomorrow, but machine wash on Tuesday, unless we run out of covers. I will also be able to use Tuesday to sum up my experience and share what I learned. Kim, the founder of the project, gave us the option to stop tonight at midnight, or to stop the 30th at midnight.

*Edited to add pictures*
I went outside to check the progress of my flats and got these pictures of my dog Isis playing under my clothes line. My camera has a super fast shutter speed and she still managed to look like a blur, she was really zooming and having a great time! Unfortunatly, my diapers are still pretty damp, and it isn’t very warm out right now, 59 degrees with an occasional breeze of 8mph, but we only have a 10% chance of rain until sunset, so just the wind alone I am hoping will dry them.

*Edited once again to add this:

It is amazing how quickly you can go from laid back to emergency. When I woke up, Liam had 1 dirty diaper in the wet pail from his night time diaper. I changed him, washed him, and put a clean diaper on him. I changed him twice more, one cover was saturated and the other one contained a poop of epic proportion. He some moisture wicked onto his clothing, but the poop mess was 100% contained in his cover. So now he has one clean cover, two dirty covers in the wet pail and so he had two clean ones, right? Problem is, *both* were missing. I called “all hands on deck” to get my helpers rounded up and one clean cover was found, someone put it on the stuffed bunny. The second one was nowhere to be found. I finally located it, 15 year old had put it in the diaper pail, not the orange wet pail I told him to. And when I asked him twice if he had moved it into the appropriate pail, he claimed he had. So I quickly washed the three covers, wrapped them in a dry towel and walked all over it to get them as dry as I could. Two got hung in my bathroom, one joined the other still wet cover outside on the line. The baby is in his last clean cover and I am changing him frequently so it stays as dry as possible. I would like to avoid having to go cover-free if at all possible. Sorry for any typos, I have a 5 month old guest blogger today who keeps trying to mess with my laptop.

No Comments | In: A lot about nothing | tags: Cloth Diapers, Domestic Diva, Me. | #

Glorious sunshine, and nary a wet diaper to hang! It looks like today is the coolest day of the long weekend, and the next two weeks will be nice and toasty, so I will wash my covers tonight as to not repeat the procrastination damp cover mistake from yesterday, but wash my flats in the morning so they can be sunning. We had a minor leak today, even with a doubled up diaper, but it was following a nursing marathon and a long nap.

The nicest thing about this challenge is the tips I have gained from the community of other bloggers participating in this experiment, just click on any of the links below and visit any of these extraordinary bloggers. Make sure you comment and tell them how awesome they doing.

Cotton Bottom Mama hung her diapers with clothes pins on hangers and then hung her diapers in a nice neat row on her shower. What a great tip! No more diapers hanging from every single surface of my bathroom!!

Another tip I read was to beat up your diapers against furniture to soften them up! This works so well, my diapers are no longer stiff, and the helpers were eager to lend a hand. I have to say, I have the cutest help ever! I was worried how well I would be able to juggle 5 kids, flats, and hand washing, especially without my husband’s help (he’s in Afghanistan), but it has been a lot easier than I imagined. I do want to say sorry to my husband, there were a few times when we were Skyping that he would run off to go shower, and I would run off to churn diapers and he would be back and dressed, and I had left him waiting. Sorry honey!

No Comments | In: A lot about nothing | tags: Bobby, Cloth Diapers, Domestic Diva, Me, Parenting. | #

Back in 2004, before the housing market went all topsy-turvy, we purchased our first home with a VA Home Loan, the process itself was easy and pretty fast and I would do it again, in fact I house hunt weekly and drool over where we *could* live. Problem is, the value of my house has dipped so much, I can’t even do a FHA Streamline Refinance. However, I view this as a blessing. It means we can’t jump into a new home without taking the proper steps first. That means 20% down, and a 15 year mortgage with payments plus insurance being no more than 25% of our take home pay. Until then, we will be happy renters and be thankful we found a house that we can fit into, with a good school district, GREAT neighbors, and allowed us to keep our pets. So, if we can’t sell our house in Colorado, and we can’t but a house in Washington in a while, I guess it’s not all bad. We will call it a 5 year plan.

No Comments | In: A lot about nothing | tags: House Stuff, Sponsored. | #