Mistakes in Motherhood

A couple weeks ago, I had a good cry fest to my friend Lynne about feeling lost; she was there for me when Bobby went to Iraq the first time as a soldier. Her husband is still enlisted AND she works for the military helping spouses through deployments. I was feeling dejected by all my friends and I felt like I was alone. A couple of my military “friends” made me feel like crap because “I don’t have it as tough as they do”, an acquaintance made me feel bad by venting and saying I felt like a single mom. She snapped at me and said I was clueless to the trials and tribulations of a single parent because I have my husband’s income. I was feeling dejected by anyone I felt I related with, and my circle of support kept feeling smaller & smaller.

Lynne offered me her shoulder and then kicked my butt into action. She gave me some ideas on how to make this year easier on all of us, some of which I have already set into action.

• Find a church family and attend regularly
• Join the YMCA for the kids & I to have an activity together & apart
• Find someone to help me with the kids, a babysitter, mother’s helper, or drop-in daycare
• Find someone to help me with household chores, someone to help me clean

The day after I spoke to her on the phone, I attended a church I have been wanting to visit for years.
I have found a neighbor who is a member of the YMCA, and I have found another friend who said she would join if I did. I have not found childcare yet, but I have a few ideas for help with housekeeping. I hope to continue to make positive changes in our lifestyle that nourish our minds, bodies & souls.

2 Comments | In: This is how I roll | tags: Babysitting, Bobby, Family, Me, Overseas Assignment, Ramblings. | #

Ok, so not quite 24 weeks, but close enough. I am 23w4d, my blood pressure is great, I still have not gained any weight, my fundal height is normal, Sophie’s heart rate is in the 140′s, she is active and strong and so far I am free of any of the normal aches and pains. My midwife was so excited to tell me about a woman she just delivered who used self-hypnosis in childbirth and she said it was the most amazing delivery. I was so thrilled for such a positive birth story, but I expect no less from my midwife who is such a nice fresh breath of air. She is so upbeat and positive, I am looking forward to my birthing day so much because I feel like I will be surrounded by amazing people between my husband, my doula, and my midwife.

My next appointment is March 4th, I will be almost 28 weeks. At this appointment we will also get to have our 3D ultrasound, I can’t wait to see my little girl in 3D, I LOVED the 3D pictures I had of Matthew. After that I will be starting to go every 2 weeks and then weekly. I love when the appointments get closer, just because it means my baby is getting closer too!

Bobby left for the CO/NM area today, he’s gone until Friday. I am so tired from lack of sleep and then having to get up early, that I am not looking forward to having to do the parenting thing alone this week. I have my three, plus the two I babysit from 4:45p-12:15a, when I want nothing more than to just crawl into my warm bed now until tomorrow and not have to worry about anyone else.

No Comments | In: Uncategorized | tags: Babysitting, Pregnancy, Sleep Deprivation, Sophia. | #

Continued from Part Two…

Today, I knew it would be a difficult day from the start. The dog and cat kept waking me up, first when the cat was licking a plastic grocery bag, next when they started fighting, again when the cat wanted out, and finally I just gave up and got up when the dog started nosing around and whining.

The day started out normal enough, A. cried for a while, laid down for a nap before Matthew awoke, so I was able to sneak in a nap of my own. The phone waked me up once, but I was able to fall back asleep for a few more minutes before Matt started crying. His leg was still not any better so I called the doctor to make an appointment for 1:20, the only appointment left for the day. Of course, at the time it totally slipped my mind that I had furniture I ordered over a month ago coming from Denver between 11:45 and 2pm and it was too late to cancel. I figured I could get A.’s dad to stay if I needed, but then he called around the time he was supposed to be here to inform me he would be late and to take A. with me to Matthew’s appointment if he was not home.

By this time, I am in total panic mode so I call Bobby begging him to come home and help, but he has an appointment at 1 pm also with a General. While all this is going on, I remembered that I had forgotten to deposit a check yesterday and I had not balanced my account, so it was really no shock to learn that I was $12 overdrawn. While I was trying to get both babies ready to go the furniture arrived so I was thrilled one thing was taken care of, but I also had the matter of having 15 minutes until I had to leave, the check needing to be deposited and the little ones to keep occupied. Thank goodness for the Deposit at home feature, even if I did keep giving me error messages. A.’s dad arrived when I was depositing the check, I had to set her down on the carpet for a moment and of course, she screamed like a banshee. Matthew had managed to crawl downstairs in the meantime, so I carried him back up in major panic mode that it was 12:55 and we were supposed to be there at 1:05 for our 1:20 appointment. I came up to my diet peach tea spilled all over the carpet I had just cleaned, put the dogs outside and rushed out to the van.

To Be Continued…

1 Comment | In: Uncategorized | tags: Babysitting, Family, Health, Ramblings. | #

Author’s note: I am splitting this story into several smaller entries to make it easier to read. I apologize if it makes it harder to follow.

If you are reading this entry hoping for a happy story of butterflies or cute fuzzy puppies, you better hit your back button right now, or better yet, click the X in the upper right corner of your screen.

In order to tell you this sad tale of woe, I have to go back, back to Saturday the 19th. The day started out ordinary… I slept in, woke up and ate lunch, went to my acupuncture appointment and then came home to relax on my day off. We had turned down the request to baby-sit baby A. that evening because we had plans with our dear friends to have a Chili potluck and we have not seen this group of friends in almost/over a month.

To Be Continued…

No Comments | In: Uncategorized | tags: Babysitting, Family, Friends, Health. | #

It is only 9:16 AM and I am already for bed… Baby A. got shots yesterday, so she has been very cranky all day today and still has not napped. About 20 minutes of crying is my limit before I want to stick wax in my ears and start crying myself.

On top of that I am exhausted and have an upset stomach. I started a new medicine last night for my PCOS which always makes me so sick and tired. I guess it is not new, since I have started and stopped it two other times in the past, but new to my system since it has been a year since I tried it last.

I can also smell pee in my house, but I am not sure from who, or where it is and it is driving me insane… it is not strong, but it is there and it will be the cherry on my “I’m going crazy Sundae”.

2 Comments | In: Uncategorized | tags: Babysitting, Ranting, Sleep Deprivation, TTC. | #

What a week! I have been so busy with preparing for Easter, dental appointments, a crabby baby A., feeling nauseous all week and now dealing with the bully again. I just want to climb under a big fluffy blanket and sleep for a week.

I know in time it will all get better, but for right now I am just sick of everything I want a break. Of course I also know that it is how we handle adversities that make us strong, so I keep reminding myself that next week this will all make us better people.

1 Comment | In: Uncategorized | tags: Austin, Babysitting, Holidays, Ranting, The OTHER Blog. | #

Dontcha you think?

So, I get up at 5:40 and shower, just like I always do when I have baby A. coming over. At 6:00am I wake up the boys to get ready for school. At 6:10 I learn that their school is on 2 hour delay, which means we ALL could have slept in two hours later :sigh:. Baby A. will not be here until 8:15-8:30ish, the boys will leave an hour later. The funny thing is, the boys’ school RARELY closes/late starts, I was honestly only expecting to see Ft Carson closed, however Bobby has to go in at the normal time, and we get to stay in late… of course HE is still sleeping, and WE are all awake.

Who would’ve thought…it figures.

No Comments | In: Uncategorized | tags: Austin, Babysitting, Christopher, School. | #

Going out and making date night is an essential part of keeping a strong marriage, but remember, keeping the babysitter happy is a great way of making sure they will give you a helping hand when you need a little time to yourselves. If you mistreat the sitter or ignore some basic principals, you may find that the sitter is not so willing to watch your little darlings. Here are some basic ideas:
Plan ahead, if your child is not up to being left and your plans allow it, reschedule; leaving a crabby or sick child with a sitter is stressful on the sitter, as well as the child itself.

Make sure you include everything your child needs, from necessities like diapers, milk, and a change of clothes for younger children; or snacks, and entertainment for the older child. Also, if your child is young, or prone to missing the parents, include any comfort objects like special blankets, toys or pacifiers.

Find out ahead of time what your sitter would like you to do for meal times, if your children will be there for a meal, and feed the sitter too, it gives them energy to run after your children!
If your child has been feverish, or gassy, include a fever reducer, or simethicone drops, along with written instructions on dosage and the time the child can take it again.

Include phone numbers (or cell phone numbers) and locations you will be going, as well as show times, if you know them.

Give notice, at least 24-4 hours, to the sitter so they know what time to expect you, or what time to be at your residence.

Don’t change your plans without notifying the sitter. If you say you will only be gone 2 hours, don’t change it to 4 or 5 hours without letting them know. An impromptu visit to the diner for steaks and eggs after a late night show may be fun, but remember, as parents, your responsibility to your children come first… and your sitter may not be too thrilled about your change of plans also.

Remember, sitters are people too and deserve a little common courtesy.

1 Comment | In: Uncategorized | tags: Babysitting. | #

I am ready to just go to sleep and call it a day.

I am still sick and when I am not pulling my hair out I am in the bathroom. I started taking my new blood pressure medicine and it is making me dizzy. I have the baby for 8 hours today and she is whining and crying (Bobby said it sounded like someone was trying to kill a cat in my house. I got MAYBE 3 hours of sleep last night. Matthew is into everything, he has gotten in some sort of trouble in every room of my house today. As soon as I bring him in here with me, he wakes up Crybaby who then gets pissed she was disturbed. My house is TRASHED…. after company on Wednesday, being sick yesterday and having both kids and both dogs being needier than normal and my patience being shot to hell, it’s taking all my strength to keep from snapping.

Calgon, take me away!!

No Comments | In: Uncategorized | tags: Babysitting, Health, Matthew, Me, Ranting. | #

No, it’s not baby A. crying, (though she IS on the floor loudly complaining) but the big baby… me!

I did not want to get up this morning at all. I woke up at 5:20 after a bizarre dream that I just cannot seem to remember right now; but instead of going back to sleep I laid awake thinking maybe I should get up and shower a few minutes early, but I could not bring myself to it and went back to sleep… that was my first mistake. I did end up falling asleep for 10 minutes and then when my alarm went off I felt like I had just been hit by a semi-truck. I hurriedly dressed just knowing baby A. would be here early and got the kids up and going. It would just figure she got here late, I would have loved to hit the snooze button, just once.

So now the dogs are at my feet, the baby is on the floor (she rolled over last night, yay! But now that means no more naps on the chair.) and I am yawning my butt off trying to get up the gumption to make a fruit smoothie for breakfast and figure out what I should tackle for today….if the baby ever naps that is!

No Comments | In: Uncategorized | tags: Babysitting, Ranting, Sleep Deprivation. | #