So instead of moving the kids into the room with the bunk beds, I left the loft portion of the bed in the playroom and removed the latter, and put the bottom bed into Sophie’s room. We got two large bags of clothes out of dressers to go to Goodwill, and packed up NINE totes of toys, each tote holding 11 gallons, which will be stored in our storage room until we rotate them in, and move other toys out. It was hard to let go of a lot of the clothes. In the process I also donated the last of my scrub sets. It was a hard decision, I always thought about going back to nursing school, or working as a nurse aide again, but it just does not make sense to store them any longer, especially when I can easily get more at places like http://www.blueskyscrubs.com/ so easily.

I am tickled at how well the two rooms look, and it will be very easy to move Liam’s crib into the play room once he is ready to leave our room. Bedtime has not been as seamless, 6 days later we are still struggling with them falling asleep in a timely matter. We are still dealing with fighting and tattling, but either in time I will grow immune, or they will chill it out. Another perk, I now have a “guest room”, so as long as you don’t mind literally climbing into bed, or sleeping in a room filled with toys.

Next on the agenda, is going to be going through my kitchen to get rid of dishes, and appliances I no longer need. Taking a trip to the dump, and getting my storage room back in control.

So earlier today (or call it yesterday if you want to keep it real) my little three decided that if they all behaved equally naughty, mom would allow it with retribution, because of safety in numbers, right? *insert melting brain here*

It felt like a country western song. Mom wanted to sleep, the phone was ringing, the baby was whining for breast milk, the 6 year old was wanting to tattle, and the 2 year old wanted a “poopy prize”. I thought everything was settled back into place, and I was going to try to get a few more minutes of sleep, when the baby boy decided he was fat, full, and flippin’ jubilant! There goes my lazy Saturday.

I should have known it was going to be one of those days, everyone was crying and fighting. It took me a full hour to get a sip of my then cold coffee. By lunchtime I was DONE. I put the sleeping baby, and the 2 year old down for naps. The 6 year old was soon sent to nap too after he demonstrated his own fatigue. However, no one napped! All three were exhausted, but no one napped. By around 3pm, I was in tears.

Of course, as soon as I had sufficiently filled my bladder with iced coffee, and was about ready to start dinner, not only did the baby, but also the 2 year old fell asleep. Thankfully the 14 year old walked in from playing to get a drink, and I asked him to hold the (now crying) baby so I could make Fra Diavolo Sauce With Farfalle Pasta, and broccoli. I changed it up a bit, I used fresh tomatoes and added some white wine. I also used only shrimp (doubled), cooked it longer, and served over farfalle (bow tie pasta) instead of linguini. I thought it might be too spicy, so I made some Cabernet Marinara with Herbs for the little ones, but offered them both. I think they favored the spicy shrimp sauce. I had to giggle a bit because they started fighting over who could have the last of the broccoli, they all decided they had not had enough, and Austin rushed in to make sure everyone got two more pieces.

We made a fresh batch of chocolate chip cookies, and at them hot, with cold glasses of milk. We were all sleepy, and I decided after everyone was in bed, that I would slip into a hot bath and then go to bed early myself….. but first let me just fix this spam problem real quick. Real quick. Famous last words.

At 10:19 PM, my darling husband gets on Skype. I tell him “Don’t laugh, but I have such a headache. And it is all from reading confusing stuff.” He reassures me he is not laughing. “Owie, hurty head. .htaccess is so confusing.” He tells me he doesn’t know what .htaccess is (I didn’t either until today. I explain what it is, what it does, and what I am using it for. I will not quote what I said because it consists of several F bombs, and other colorful expletives… and I would like to remain classy.

I tell him “Half my face is limp. I must have stroked out somewhere between .htaccess ssh and ftp”. My darling husband says “I want to see”, and starts a video conference. *sigh* At 10:44, about the time I told him my brain was made of pudding, and drool was dripping out of my half-limp stroked out face, the butt tells me “I have worse problems btw. I can not find my hair brush.”

While his hair WAS quite poofy, by this time I was ready to hang myself by my shoe laces. I had no less than 15 tutorials open, terminal, my ftp, a glass of wine and my sanity was long gone. Four minutes later, he proclaims all is right in the world, he has found his hair brush. Well lah dee freakin’ dah! He then asked me if that was my soul he saw leaking out of my eyes. Well yes it is.

At 11:36, he tells me he has to go to work. And I tell him I have to bash my skull in with a baseball bat. A little after 12:10am, I figure out the problem. The file I was looking for could EASILY be created by opening a simple word processor, uploading it to my ftp (server), renaming it, and then editing it with the script I wanted, and voila, spammer would be 404ed. I have no idea if my 2-3 hours worked, but I guess I will find out soon enough when my spam folders keep filling up. AHHHH, what a nightmare!

So now that it is 2am, I can finally climb into bed, and in 4 hours I can start this all over again. Sleep deprived and crabby. As soon as I finish knitting this last row real quick.

Tonight he came out of his bedroom holding his toy turtle, who had his legs in handcuffs. One side held his front legs, the other shackle held his two back legs together. He says to me “my turtle was arrested. He shot his pet. He’s being charged with hunting without a license“. Where does he learn this stuff??

This weekend, my fried, who was staying with the kids, texted me that she had three little Matthewisms, as I call them, for me. One was when she was reading him the back of the Lego Batman video game case to him, including the rating, he said “I LOVE cartoon violence”. He later told her “You have an awsomer house than us. We only have one ghosts, and you have lots of ‘em”. Later that same day, he explained to her that Toasted Oats (generic Cheerios) are healthier than Cheerios, because they have more fiber. Much like how he tried to explain to me that the cheese on the nachos I was making was the healthiest part, and when I told him it wasn’t he said “I meant the beans, the BEANS are the healthiest part”. He did the same with his snack I picked him up for school. His week to bring snack is “Vv” week, so for fun I got Vegetable Thins. The little goober grabs the box, looking at the pictures of vegetables and says “I am reading the label, yup, these look healthy and delicious.” Then he pauses and says “What?!? No broccoli? But broccoli is the healthiest!! We need to take these back and get some that say ‘Now, with broccoli!’ because I would like those the best.”

I could go on and on, like when he cried because his brother said he may need braces when he is 13 (he was 5 at the time) and cried because he would need braces soon, 8 years was just not that long at all. Or when the last tooth he was lost started wiggling and he cried because he didn’t want to lose that tooth, it was his favorite tooth, and he tastes with that particular tooth. These are not the first two times we have had Matthewisms related to teeth, case and point see: “The butterfly will bite me!” and “Here fishy, fishy”

Through his tears he created fantastic stories of what could have happened. “Maybe she forgot her cat away, and the cat scared her?” “Maybe she is sick?” I offered. That was rejected. Then as if he was not sufficiently traumatized, wailing part two ensues. I guess he was playing with the tooth on the floor and it fell down the vent. Now he was facing another possibility.. not only did the tooth fairy forget him, but now she was never going to come! He decided that maybe if he wrote a not and put it under his pillow, he could get back into her good graces. The note read “I m srrye, I lost my tooth”. Thankfully his brother helped him dig it out. However I still had to figure out what to do. To buy some time to think up a convincing lie decent plan, I sent him off to the shower. Since he has a bunk bed, I put a dollar under a pillow in his top bunk. Silly mama, how dare I assume he didn’t overturn every pillow. He saw through my deception immediately.

We settled on a story that maybe the tooth fairy was just running late, his brother convinced him that maybe a lot of children in china has lost their teeth. After all that, the little turkey wanted me to put his crisp new dollar I picked out just for him, into his checking account. Love that boy!

Next time he loses a tooth, I am insisting he hangs his sister’s “Welcome Tooth Fairy” pillow on his door knob, as a reminder for her not to fly on by.

Quickies:

Liam is 2 months old today, he had a well baby exam and was 13 lbs. 3 oz shy of a 6 pound weight gain. Over 6 pounds if you count his lowest weight, he’s also gained 3 inches. Pretty awesome if you figure he’s gained 3 inches in 2 months and the average is 2 inches. The average weight gain is 5-7oz a week and he averages 11.6 a week.

Dude– I’m never getting another Dell. Christopher’s charger for his Alienware broke. 4 months of light use, we are talking probably 20 times of unplugging/plugging. It is a BAD design, think of a thin copper wire, like maybe the size of a .7mm pencil lead, housed inside a plug as big around as a pencil with the eraser pulled out. I was told that they would not honor my warranty because if it broke, it was “abuse”. BS! Got an aftermarket charger on eBay, no way is Dell getting $80 from me for a new cord.

Dyson, ROCKS. I love them! Their customer service is top notch. I called to order a new cover for brush, a thin piece melted or broke off. They are sending an entire brush mount, a $110 retail part, for free, on a 1 1/2 yr old vacuum. No questions asked. So now my raves for customer service are Apple, Comcast, Dyson, Verizon, Automated Petcare Products (Litter Robot), and of course USAA.

Austin was holding Liam last week and said “I LOVE it when his face turns colors, it is so red”. I said “yes honey, that is because he’s pooping”. His eyes got big, his face got red and he said “oh god no!!” and passes him back to me. Funny boy!

Sophia is totally potty trained, and we ventured out into public today without any accidents. Still no poop success, and we have not braved overnight yet.

Matthew got this ‘stache from a birthday party yesterday, I had to tell him to take it off to go to bed, he wanted to keep it on. I told him he looks like a young Burt Reynolds, but he didn’t get the reference, so I called him Baby Earl from the TV showMy Name is Earl. All day I was saying “my name is Matt”.

Christopher has been an absolute joy this week. He’s finally been allowed to get a Facebook page and has been absolutely superb at getting his chores done without being told.

I started writing this post 7 hours ago. I kept getting interrupted.

The little two started seeing a new dentist this week. Our old insurance didn’t cover any pediatric dentists in the area, so we were all going to a general practice dentist. With the new year, we got a new insurance carrier, and with that a new pediatric dentist. Normally, the dentist, who is also a orthodontist, will only see new patients before they are teenagers, but because my 13 year old needs braces, and because my little two are being seen there, the dentist decided to see Christopher to go over a treatment plan for braces. Christopher could not be happier or more excited to get braces. Obviously he’s not the one paying for them. LOL I wonder if it is a right of passage for middle-schoolers to have metal glued onto their teeth?

Sophia seems to have found her life’s calling. She had so much fun flitting around the open bay of the dentist’s office harassing all the hygienists. She made sure everyone was graced with her presence and tried out every single chair she could find. She tested the air hoses, adjusted the exam lights, and inspected Dr. Andy’s work. They even gave her a small oral mirror so she could do oral exams on her brothers.

As you can see, Matthew’s fangs were in perfect condition this visit.

The only problem is, Sophia has been in the office twice, yet she still has not had a turn at seeing the dentist! Her appointment isn’t until next week. She could not be more excited. I completely understand where she gets it from, it was two years ago, when Matthew was just a little older, that he cried because he was disappointed we had gone to the aquarium instead of the dentist. I can completely understand who she gets her excitement about the dentist from…. but what planet do they come from?

Even though he won’t be four weeks old until tomorrow, I wanted to go ahead and update while I had a moment… easier said than done when you have five kids (only the little three are home right now, and the littlest one is napping).

He’s a pretty mellow little guy, but he is also pretty needy, especially at night. He will sleep a couple hours at a time as long as he is in my arms. I am getting more accustom to sleeping with him in my arms, which is something I just do not enjoy.

[Interruption #1, Sophia climbed up on her dresser and dumped all the water from her wipe warmer all over her dresser and floor trying to plug it in. It was unplugged because it is broken.]

His brothers and sister adore him, but his sister is not too sure she likes sharing her spotlight. I know she loves him, but I also think she’s a little resentful that he’s always in arms. I am trying my hardest to make sure she gets extra attention and I am including her in his care by asking her to be my helper.

[Interruption #2, 3 & 4. Sophie is trying to dress herself and is bringing me clothes, shoes, and a diaper. Then she broke the latch off her dress-up chest and wanted me to come fix it.]

Matthew is constantly asking to hold Liam, and usually his timing is bad. I will have just latched him onto the breast and Matt appears out of nowhere and says “Can I hold Liam?”

[Interruption #5, 6, 7, Sophia found a shirt she liked and asked me to button it up, asked me to put a diaper on her that was wet from the wipe warmer water, and when I sent her away for a dry one she brought a pocket that didn't have an insert]

Christopher really does not ask or attempt to hold him anymore.

[Interruption #8, had to empty the potty chair]

Austin loves holding him though and is always asking to hold him, or stealing him out of his swing. I am so impressed with him, he is going to make such a good husband and daddy someday. He does his own laundry, loves to cook, adores babies and is very thoughtful. I figure when he’s 30 I am going to auction him off to the highest bidder.

[Interruption #9, 10 & 11, emptied the potty seat again, broke up a fight between Sophie & Matt over a balloon, and got a hug from Matthew for finding a lost villain for his superhero toys.]

Sophie has to be reminded not to put her feet on Liam’s head, I am not sure WHY she insists on doing this, but it is annoying.

[Interruption #12, drama over panties. Sophie claims she has some, Matthew tells her she doesn't, shouting match ensues.]

[Interruption #13-16, Liam wakes up, on the way to get him I have to rescue Sophie from herself, she has somehow climbed in the back of her diaper storage tower and is stuck. Get the baby up, change his diaper and his clothes. Sophie throws a fit because she insists she needs a wipe. Then throws another fit because I closed my door, not her.]

Liam is a pretty content little guy, he loves to cuddle and watch your face. He’s starting to smile a bit and engage a bit more.

[Interruption #17, baby needs to nurse.]

[Interruption #18 through ??.... had to make lunch one handed for Sophie & Matt, pick up my kitchen, all while holding a fussy boy who wants to nurse again.]

#!&% it, I give up. Yup, I see exactly why the last 4 weeks have flown by.

FYI: this took me 90 minutes to write.

We started the day by distracting the kids with box-forts we helped them make. When I got my new washer and dryer, we asked them to leave the appliance boxes for the kids.



Bobby cut doors and windows in the boxes for the kids (while Austin posed for photo-ops) and then we let them decorate them or continue to cut them how the pleased. They ended up creating a tunnel and joining the two boxes.

While they were playing with the boxes, I wrote directions on sticky notes at each child’s level. For Austin and Chris I had a list of small chores that had a new hint at the end of it.

Christopher found his video game in the freezer when his last note asked him to see how much bread we had in the freezer, where Austin’s Blu-Ray was found in the dishwasher after the final clue told him to see if the dishes in the dishwasher needed started.

Matthew’s last clue simply said “tub” and Sophia’s only clue had a picture of a cat and she found her gifts in the scratching post.

For dinner we had dessert first, ice cream cake, and Sophie made a big mess.

She was so messy in fact, a bath was the only solution.

We also sold Bobby’s VW bug today too, so that was great news, since we can’t take it to WA with us, and the person who sold it will take good care of it I am sure.

Sophie saw her gastro this morning, all her tests were normal, so after we move we need to get her evaluated by a endocrinologist to make sure there is nothing hormonal going on. If that is normal, I am done testing her. I guess I just don’t want to leave any stones unturned, especially if it is something we can fix. I am fairly certain it is just genetic, but I would feel bad if she just needed supplements or something to reach full growth potential and I chose not to investigate it.

While he was cooling down, Austin went upstairs to get some pajamas for Sophie out of Matthew’s room, and I hear them arguing and then I hear Matthew say “IF YOU TELL HER, I WILL KICK YOU!!!” Austin came running downstairs with a silly smile on his face and explained that he needed to tell me what Matthew said. I guess in a fit of rage, my darling sweet son turned into some sort of monster when he told Austin angrily “Next time I see Mommy with a knife, I am going to tell her I hope she cuts her head off!”

The problem with this statement, is that it would be nearly impossible for me to keep a straight face when confronting him about it. After having a giggle and updating my Facebook page, I called my parents to take turns telling them one of my near-famous “Matthew Stories”. They also had a giggle and then I mustered as much composure as I could and “angrily” marched upstairs.

Matthew was very remorseful and said he let some angry words come out and that he was very sad about what he said. He claimed he tried to say “next time I see mommy with a knife, I am going to tell her I hope she cuts some vegetables“, but the other words just slipped out. This is where I had to turn my head and hold my breath to keep from cracking up. He apologized freely and we talked about how it was not okay to be naughty like he had been when I sent him to bed early, and that he needs to try not to have angry words, because once the words are out they cannot go back and can hurt someone’s feelings. I gave him a hug and a kiss goodnight, and surprisingly enough he went to bed fairly easily. I have a feeling he was tired in the first place, causing the naughty behavior in the first place that led to angry words. Having a four year old is an adventure.

Wow, what a whirlwind of the last 3 months. I had a GLORIOUS summer. First vacation was up to Glenwood Hot Springs a few hours northeast of here in Glenwood Colorado.

The drive was gorgeous, the kids loved all the tunnels and the hot springs were amazing. The pool was a city block and so comfortable. Sophie fell asleep floating in my arms several times.

The next weekend we went to Canon City about an hour from here to camp in these amazing little one bedroom (sleeps 6) cabin with a full kitchen and bathroom. We stayed at a Yogi Bear campground, so the kids were super busy with activities and contests. Austin did an essay for a contest on his dad since we were there for father’s day and made me cry.

As soon as we were unpacked from Yogi I packed up the 4 kids and two large dogs and drove 1200 miles to visit my family. I got to spend a few days in Montana with my oldest sister and her 5 little ones (sorta, two teens, a tween, the youngest two are the most adorable twin toddler girls!!) After that I went to my parents land in Idaho where we spent the 4th of July on the beach, picked huckleberries, and enjoyed each others company. My grandparents came over from Montana to see us and it was so wonderful to see them again. Then we headed back to Spokane were we went back and forth between Spokane and the cabin in Idaho for the rest of the month. I also got to see my other sister and her two kids who are just amazing kids. My niece writes music and plays them on the guitar and athletic and confident and just a remarkable young woman. Here are a few pictures of our time in Priest Lake:

Two days after we returned from Idaho, Bobby came home from Iraq for 3 weeks. Our anniversary is July 28th and he flew home the afternoon of the 27th so with the help of my friend Tracie I was able to plan an amazing little getaway. We went to a super nice restaurant in town and then I surprised him with an overnight stay in a gorgeous suite at a 4 star hotel at the Cliff House in Manitou Springs. They had a bottle of wine and chocolate covered strawberries and a rose waiting for us when we arrived.

Then we were off for our family vacation to Disney World!! The kids had NO idea where we were going so when we missed our flight they were super bummed. A night at the Hilton near the airport and all was forgotten.

When we finally made it to Orlando we had so much fun. The weather was hot and muggy but we did not mind. The park was crowded and the lines were long but we barely noticed. By the end of the day we were so happy we had rented a house and had our own rooms to go to and a full kitchen so we could just grab a bowl of cereal and crash for the night. We spent two days at the Magic Kingdom.

Then we spent a day in Epcot, which really was not enough!

We also spent a day at Animal Kingdom, where my camera battery promptly died and a rushed day at Hollywood Studios because we were having a little get together with three families who live in Florida whom I have been friends with for seven years. Talk about a fun night!! The kids got along great, the men folk hit it off instantly, and we girls had a blast talking the night away.

Bobby’s vacation was over before we knew it and the boys headed back to school. Austin and Christopher are both in middle school this year and Matthew is in his last year of preschool.

They are enjoying school, except Austin had a problem with his math teacher. She was bullying him and talking down to him since day one. She seemed to single him out. Anyone who knows Austin knows this kid is a golden child. Today he *asked* me if he could put my laundry away for me and folded a basket of laundry without being asked and then put it away. The same child I heard tell his brothers “lets keep the kitchen clean, mom worked hard on it today”. Well his breaking point was when he was sitting on his feet so he could see his math book, he’s short like we are and the desks are bigger this year. The teacher yelled at him to sit on his butt and when he explained he could not see if he sat that way she told him “maybe you need to have your mommy send you in with a booster seat?!” Austin did not say anything, but went to the principal to demand a new teacher because he was tired of being treated like dirt and then having her demand his respect. The school still has not called to tell me of this incident or to apologize, but I have not called them either as I kind of fell like this is Austin’s battle, not mine and he is handling it like a true warrior!

Christopher has his ups and downs. On one hand he is helping out more to earn money to replace games he lost of Austin’s, he mowed the lawn for me tonight. On the other hand he is having problems with doing what he needs to do in a timely matter (getting ready for school, completing homework, etc) and he has had a few outbursts here and there that are uncalled for.

Matthew is having a hard time with preschool this year, he’s having some major separation issues and clings to me at drop-off. Once I leave he is fine, but man he wrenches at my heart strings. Today I was listening to music and he said to me “I sure like this song about them living in a lallow sub-barine!!” He’s a funny boy.

Other than that, we are trying to adjust to Sophie’s moods. She’s getting 4 molars in right now and her 4 front teeth are still trying to come in the rest of the way. If that is not bad enough, because of teething she is getting horrible bleeding diaper rashes so both ends are hurting her. She is talking up a storm and says “here you go” “go bye?” “yogurt” “mommy” “Austin” among all her other words. She’s a smart little thing and made her toy say bye-bye by cycling through other sounds until it came back to bye-bye again when I was pressuring her to wave bye-bye to me.

Bobby and I are doing well, 5 more months until he gets home and I am just trying to stay busy to help move time. I am also trying to get healthier and keep my house cleaner. I am trying to get into the habit of going to the gym on M, W & F when I drop the kids off at school. I have already started to see and feel changes in myself.

So, if you have made it this far, here is my massive update of why I have been MIA. I am hoping be around a little more now that school has started. If you want a link to *all* my Disney pics the link is here.

Next week we will be driving home to WA state to go spend time with my family for 3-4 weeks, and then we will come home in time for Bobby to come home on leave for 3 weeks. We are planning a huge surprise family vacation, but I am not saying where until the airplane tickets are purchased and the vacation home rented. The kids start back at school 2 days before Bobby heads back to Iraq.

So I picked up a magazine and I asked him “What is that?” and he says “girl” and I said “but she is a grownup, so what is she” and he says “she is a woman!” so then I found a picture of an adult male and asked him what that was and he thought a moment and said “he’s a dude!!”

What is even funnier about the answer is that from the time he could talk, Matthew has been calling our friend across the street “The Man”, no matter how many times we corrected him or told him his name, he was always still just “The Man”.

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Austin found a pit bull puppy today and put it in our back yard with a bowl of water. It was salivating so much from being thirsty that Christopher said “Oh no! It has rabies! It is foaming at the mouth!” The pup was nice enough, but I sure was glad that the humane society was quick in picking it up.

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Sophie has been a pill for the last two days. Nothing seems to make her happy and she is not wanting to eat or nap. I think we may be seeing some new teeth soon. On a positive note, I was able to get all her 6-9 month clothing washed and sorted and put away with any of her 3-6 month summer clothes that still fit. She was screaming at my feet almost the entire time, but at least I managed to get it done. Thankfully it looks like she should have enough clothes to make it through the summer, especially if the ones I have soaking in oxyclean come clean. I may take a trip to the new Goodwill soon, because I am sure everyone could use some new summer clothes.